Voice of the White House

January 30, 2012

Washington, D.C.:
"I see that Obama is now doing all kinds of useless double-talk about the terrible, pending mortgage problems in this country. He can do nothing about this looming catastrophe without infuriating either the American banks or rich foreign investors whose countries sit on top of oil fields, but he will wave his arms and talk and talk hoping to blanket the issue until after the November elections. He has done nothing about the unemployment but wave his arms and talk: and unemployment is growing, not shrinking. The dollar is slipping against almost all the world's currencies, but nothing is being done about it. On the other side, the lunatic Republicans want to do shut down the unions, drain all the extant pension funds, shut off social security and medicade, and invite Jesus to come and live at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue instead of the corporate offices of Goldman Sachs. The more restive the public becomes, the more aggressive the law enforcement muscle of the administration flexes. Soon, small children of eight or nine will be arrested for overdue library books and jaywalkers will get life sentences in Pelican Bay prison. Eventually, the public will have had enough and then we will see a real boom in air travel as legions of government officials and law enforcement agents leap onto flights to Antiqua or Brazil to avoid long sentences in Leavenworth or Atlanta. Don’t bet against this, sweethearts, because you'd lose big."