Voice of the White House
November 8, 2019

Washington, D.C.: I was walking back to my work area after lunch today when I encountered a woman of interest wandering in the hall. She had long hair, no makeup, wore a huge crucifix around her neck and carried a purse that looked capable of carrying car bombs. She stopped me and asked me:’Have you found Jesus?’ I looked concerned and replied, ‘I didn’t know he was lost. Is there a reward?’ She glared at me. ‘Are you a Satanist? I’ll tell President Trump about you!’ she screamed. I am surprised she didn’t wet herself. There are plenty of these loonies around here these days but there are more retread fascists slinking up and down the halls. I keep looking for the swastika armbands but so far have not had any luck...